Inconceivable

Thought I'd post an update, if you can consider it as one! The current date listed on the CCAA's box for referrals is March 24, 2006. If you do the math that's 16 days worth of referrals in the past 4 months. Do you think it will ever happen??? My answer is NO!
Btw, the pic is one of me on my vacation in Malta. If you haven't been you NEED to go!!

Unbelievable

I can hardly believe that my last post stated that the CCAA had referred up to and including January 31, 2006! That was 9 months ago!!! They are only at March 8, 2006 right now...that's 36 days of referrals in 9 months. When it's laid out like that I guess the rumours that China will eventually shut down it's NSN IA program are likely.

China Update

The CCAA has referred babies to families with a LID up to and including January 31/06. It's predicted that February '06 will not be finished with the referrals until February 2009! Yes, that's how SsssLlllOooooWwwww this process is turning out to be!!!!

Nanny Cathy

This is the marvellous lady who devised the pattern for Layla's OHGWQ and then brought it to fruition!

Warm and Cuddly

Layla's OHGWQ is finally finished!! It is absolutely gorgeous. Nanny Cathy delivered it a few weeks ago. She cut all the material and pieced everything together and basically answered my prayers by doing it for me. Layla is so blessed to have such a beautiful keepsake created with Nanny's love. Nanny Cathy also made a smaller version of the OHGWQ as a special crib quilt. The picture shows Nanny Cathy signing the quilt.

Almost there!

No, I don't mean Layla but it's something great all the same! After 7 months of building, 6 months living with my mom and 10 months since we started the process, our brand new house will be ready on Monday. I am really psyched about it and best of all...Rob is home to do the unpacking! I cannot believe that our dream house is almost a reality.

Holy !@#$

Okay, it's official I'm not really excited about this adoption process any more. I want Layla don't get me wrong! I want to be a mommy and I will wait the 3-7 years they're predicting in order for it to happen BUT the specialness of this journey has slowly eroded. Every day there are more questions about when and I'm sick to death of saying one year, a year and a half, two years. Now I just say I don't know. Is there a way to gain back the happy feeling? Perhaps a full months worth of referrals would do the trick.

The Neverending Story

I've been neglecting my blog. I have a million reasons why but I guess the biggest one is denial. It's hard to come to terms with the realization that Layla may not be in my arms until 2011 or 2012. Yep, that's the latest news in this saga. Many agencies started circulating letters to their clients last week with this latest update. I simply find it difficult to remain positive in the face of such blatant negativity. As a result I guess the blog doesn't really make much sense...maybe when we're closer to our referral???
I think I may switch the focus of the blog now and then. Of course I need to do a few updates regarding things my SP has sent and a gorgeous outfit Poppy Bernie had delivered from China. Oh,Nanny Cathy has Layla's OHGWQ started...perhaps things aren't as bleak as they seem.

We're Out of Review!!

It's hard to believe it but it's absolutely true...we're officially out of the Review Room! This means that in the eyes of the CCAA we are good to go!!! Of course our dossier moves on to the Matching Room and waits (and waits) on a shelf until they hit our LID date. Right now the CCAA are working on files logged in after December 14, 2005. It's a slow process but it does happen. I'd like to think that next Christmas would find us only a few short months away from holding Layla in our arms but I think that's extremely unlikely. All I can think is that there's a plan that's set out for Rob and me...one that we have to trust and follow. It's probably best to follow Denver's lead and relax when and where we can!

Wow! It's Our 13 Month Lidaversary!

I cannot believe that 13 months have passed since our file was logged into the CCAA's system! I figured that 13 months would take FOREVER to go by but it really has been a whirlwind of activity. I hope the next 13 months go by as quickly so that Layla will be in my arms for Halloween 2009!!!

Our amazing Secret Pal strikes again!!

Our SP always outdoes herself but this time she blew us out of the
water! She is beyond generous with her thoughtful gifts and words. I
found this month's theme difficult but our SP sure didn't. We received
a gorgeous diaper bag stitched from Chinese fabric that is pastel green
with purple and gold blossoms. My breath left my body when I saw it.
I've been carrying it around the house and looking in the mirror.
Inside this marvellous creation was a "Ouchie" ice pack mouse that you
keep in the freezer, a Fisher Price cell phone, a pink fleece blanket
embroidered with the words "I love Mommy", a pink Munchkin shopping
cart cover and the book "Shaoey and Dot." To top it all off her
little girl drew us a butterfly on the outside of the box (a definite
keepsake for the SP scrapbook). SP, you touch our hearts with your innate ability to charm a smile from us even when we don't feel up to it. We are forever grateful for your kindness.

"The Secret" really works!

In my last post I discussed the book "The Secret" and how I was going to change my way of thinking. Well, I did and it worked!! My DH was offered the position we were praying and hoping for. It means we don't have to move which in turn means it won't affect our adoption process!!! I am so happy. If you haven't read this book go and get it NOW!!!

I'm Changing My Way of Thinking

I am in the midst of reading "The Secret." It's basic theory purports that we attract everything in our life through our thoughts, no matter if it's good or bad. "Thoughts become things." The book rules out notions of luck, chance happenstance, wrong place at the wrong time and so on. It's pretty much a life altering notion...you can ask for your deepest desire and you will receive it. So I've decided that I'm going to apply these principles to Layla's adoption process. Positive thinking from here on in! Btw,the calligraphic characters above are Layla's name in Mandarin.

The past and the future

It's a glorious day here in my part of the world. I just finished a lovely walk through the city's largest park. The public pool is open and peals of laughter were abundant as I passed by. Of course I had to take a trip down memory lane and think of all the days I spent splashing around in the very same pool. After that reverie I started to think of the future. Will Layla make memories in that park? Will we enjoy sunny afternoon picnics under the shady trees? Will I hear her squeal with delight and ask me to push her higher on the swings? I can only hope that these wishes come true. I believe deep in my heart that Layla will join my family;it's just a matter of when.

Canada Day at the Cabin

What a scoff we had yesterday! There we ten of us at Mom's cabin who chowed down on deep fried turkey,egg salad, mustard salad, beet salad, beet and corn salad, macaroni salad, coleslaw, corn chip salad, bow tie salad, Mediterranean salad, citrus salad, rolls, ice cream sandwich dessert and a Canada day cake. Whew! It took long enough to write it so can you think of how long it took to prepare? It was delicious!!! We all had a plate or two plus we all took home doggie bags. I even brought home a plate to my Dad and his girlfriend. Guess what? We could still feed 20 more!
To top off the evening we had a lovely fire by the pond and we set off 15-20 fireworks. We had a blast!

Goodies From Cousin Sarah

Layla's big cousin Sarah who we'll probably end up referring to as "Auntie Sarah" couldn't resist purchasing a few items. Now truth be known Sarah loves to shop for herself but she is very generous too. I've never seen a 20 year old with such a solid head on her shoulders (Not even myself). I have the teeniest feeling that Sarah will give Layla her penchant for 'the good stuff'...the pink jeans are Tommy Hilfiger! I love the little dress and tshirt too. My daughter is going to be one stylin' baby.

My Secret Pal Does it Again!!!

This month my SP sent lovely things themed around travel. She gave me a folding bag,aluminum luggage tags,an aluminum sewing kit, a passport holder, a card game called "52 Fun things to do on a plane" and a gorgeous travel journal with the Mandarin calligraphic symbol for JOY etched on the cover. Of course the note she included was so thoughtful. My SP is spoiling me and I am loving every minute of it! Thank-you SP whomever you may be. :)

A belated thank-you for my Mother's Day gift

My secret pal is wonderful! I received a beautiful pendant and matching earrings for Mother's day. They are the Chinese characters for mother. I was so delighted and continue to be deeply touched by this gift. I apologize to my SP for being so late with my gratitude.

Loot from Vegas

My mother went to Las Vegas in April. She had a marvellous time! I can't post everything she brought back to me because you'd say I'm spoiled rotten. I'm spoiled, I admit it but I am not rotten. Actually I can be quite nice when the mood strikes me :) I am posting the items Nana brought back to Layla from Gymboree.The loot included a reversible blanket, shoes, socks and a bib. All are done in a ladybug motif.I gotta say if I ever get to that store my Visa will probably burst into flames.

Thanks Jocelyn!

This gorgeous picture frame and a handmade card were sent to me by my dear friend Jocelyn. She is such a wonderful person! She thinks Layla's picture will look marvellous in the frame. I'm sure Jocelyn hit the nail on the head and there's no doubt Layla will be spoiled (But definitely not a brat). I wish Jocelyn and I lived closer to one another. It would be so much fun to shop, go to movies and have girl's night out with each other in tow. Most of all it would be amazing to raise our girls together. I'm thankful Joce is such a good friend. I value her friendship even if she didn't send me lovely gifts.